Feedback is the 5th key to the 7 gates of understanding and agreement. Remember that all gates have to be "open" for an optimal communication flow to be achieved. As a reminder, the first 4 gates are (Community, Intent, Coherence and Clarity). With the Feedback gate, we unlock the true meaning of communication, because only in the feedback we receive can we truly measure how our communication was received by the audience.
A classical situation for the feedback gate to show up is any time you hear the phrase ...
"But I said ... "
We generally make the assumption that what we say/send is what is being heard or perceived This is simply not the case. Everything we communicate is based on our world model (assumptions, experience, knowledge, etc.) as well as our emotional state, culture, intent etc. Everything we say is "loaded" with implicit context. If for example you go into a meeting and simply say "42 is the answer" ... you will achieve very mixed results. Some people will immediately grasp the hint towards Douglas Adam's Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy book series. Other people will simply ignore the statement as completely meaningless. Other people in turn will try to think about what the possible meaning of the statement could be and will be frustrated by their inability to do so.
The inverse is true for everything we hear or perceive. Any message has to pass through dozens of "filters" before it even reaches our conscious attention. Filters like our own world model, our own emotional state, our own expectations on what should happen next etc. In addition to that, what we consciously perceive is a tunnel vision snapshot of the world constructed by our brain which freely fills in certain bits of information to achieve a consistent experience. (if you don't believe this, read any of the 100's of books on how the brain makes up the mind .. I don't intend to rewrite these books here)
The key point is. No matter how much you know about communication. No matter how good you THINK you are in terms of carity of thought and message creation. ONLY feedback can tell you what really happened. And, as an emerging master communicator, you should not judge the feedback as either good or bad, but just take it for what it is. The proof that a communication flow was etablished, and the opportunity to fine tune the flow until the desired results is achieved.
I will add too this chapter as I complete more research and obtain your feedback on chapters 1 through 7
A classical situation for the feedback gate to show up is any time you hear the phrase ...
"But I said ... "
We generally make the assumption that what we say/send is what is being heard or perceived This is simply not the case. Everything we communicate is based on our world model (assumptions, experience, knowledge, etc.) as well as our emotional state, culture, intent etc. Everything we say is "loaded" with implicit context. If for example you go into a meeting and simply say "42 is the answer" ... you will achieve very mixed results. Some people will immediately grasp the hint towards Douglas Adam's Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy book series. Other people will simply ignore the statement as completely meaningless. Other people in turn will try to think about what the possible meaning of the statement could be and will be frustrated by their inability to do so.
The inverse is true for everything we hear or perceive. Any message has to pass through dozens of "filters" before it even reaches our conscious attention. Filters like our own world model, our own emotional state, our own expectations on what should happen next etc. In addition to that, what we consciously perceive is a tunnel vision snapshot of the world constructed by our brain which freely fills in certain bits of information to achieve a consistent experience. (if you don't believe this, read any of the 100's of books on how the brain makes up the mind .. I don't intend to rewrite these books here)
The key point is. No matter how much you know about communication. No matter how good you THINK you are in terms of carity of thought and message creation. ONLY feedback can tell you what really happened. And, as an emerging master communicator, you should not judge the feedback as either good or bad, but just take it for what it is. The proof that a communication flow was etablished, and the opportunity to fine tune the flow until the desired results is achieved.
I will add too this chapter as I complete more research and obtain your feedback on chapters 1 through 7
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