Today's advanced medical techniques include a concept called "keyhole surgery". The principle is simple: The surgeon makes a tiny cut in the patient's skin, inserts a medical tool, performs the surgery - for example working on a patella in an athlete's knee - removes the tool and stitches or even glues up the small incision. The advantages are that the surgery can be done more quickly, the wound is more manageable and heals more quickly.
What does this have to do with communication? How can this be even remotely related to the world of words, language, logic, concepts and culture?
I thought of this analogy recently when thinking about how communication between 2 individuals actually works.
In order for any communication to work at all, both persons have to share a lot of things in common. A common language for once. But a common language is not enough. Elements of a common culture are required as well, as is a shared context for the communication.
When language, culture, context and quite a number of other things line up, a coherent communications flow can begin. One could say we have "Comm-Unity" and a compatible "model" of the world.
If, however, a shared model is not in place, when "Comm-Unity" has NOT been established, one can see a lot of misunderstanding. And while these misunderstandings are often funny, they are more often very frustrating and sometimes even tragic.
Again, you might say, what does this have to do with "keyhole surgery"?
The analogy is that - when we communicate -, we are actually opening a "keyhole" into the World Model of the person we are attempting to communcate with. We are "inserting" the "surgical tools" of our communication (words, body language, speed and tone of voice, outer appearance, pheromones, choice of setting, mode of communication) into the World Model of the other person. But we don't really see the "inside" of the other person. We can't. All we see is the response we get, and that has to be interpreted by us using our own World Model. In order for any communication to flow, we have to make a lot of assumptions on the mental "anatomy" of the communications partner. And these assumptions, and sometimes a lack of awareness of the complete scope of our messages are the reasons that so much communication leads to misunderstandings.
So. Thats how "keyhole surgery" and communications can be compared. The huge difference between keyhole surgery and communication (apart from the fact that it is probably not a very strong analogy) is that it is usually performed by highly trained surgeons who spend years and years in university, and many more years practicing as residents in a hospital before they get to cut anyone open. The risks are simply too high, keyhole or not, a lot of things can go wrong and we want our surgeons to be the best.
With communication, however, most people are untrained and unaware of how communication even works, and therefore very unsuccessful in getting their points across successfully in many situations.
This series of blogs is intended to capture essential ideas about the art and science of communication. To create a Communications Flow System (CommFlowSystem) of training that provides a structured approach to become a master of communication at all levels.
The fundamental axioms of the CommFlowSystem will be based on the following categories
(1) Community ... how to establish common ground / rapport with the target audience or culture earning the right to establish a flow
(2) Intent ... be clear on the purpose and intended outcome(s) of the communication, (inform, inspire, entertain, educate, call to action, ...)
(3) Coherence ... how to apply ALL means of communication available (body language, setting, medium, language, tools, logic, continuity etc.) in a consistent fashion
(4) Feedback ... since the meaning of any communication is determined by the feedback you obtain this axiom will be about learning how to solicit and read feedback at all levels
(5) Flexibility .. how to adjust to different mental models and approaches to maintain flexibility, respond to feedback and avoid disrupting the flow
(6) Influence .. how to apply an understanding of the mind to influence the flow in a certain direction (calming, persuading, objection handling etc.)
(7) Clarity ... how to achieve utmost simplicity and how to remove confusion, clutter and waste in your communication
The main goal of this blog series to to distil my personal experience as well as 100's of books read into an essential guide that will help anyone to become a better communicator.
I look forward to your ideas, input and feedback
Vierkirchen, Feb 13, 2011
What does this have to do with communication? How can this be even remotely related to the world of words, language, logic, concepts and culture?
I thought of this analogy recently when thinking about how communication between 2 individuals actually works.
In order for any communication to work at all, both persons have to share a lot of things in common. A common language for once. But a common language is not enough. Elements of a common culture are required as well, as is a shared context for the communication.
When language, culture, context and quite a number of other things line up, a coherent communications flow can begin. One could say we have "Comm-Unity" and a compatible "model" of the world.
If, however, a shared model is not in place, when "Comm-Unity" has NOT been established, one can see a lot of misunderstanding. And while these misunderstandings are often funny, they are more often very frustrating and sometimes even tragic.
Again, you might say, what does this have to do with "keyhole surgery"?
The analogy is that - when we communicate -, we are actually opening a "keyhole" into the World Model of the person we are attempting to communcate with. We are "inserting" the "surgical tools" of our communication (words, body language, speed and tone of voice, outer appearance, pheromones, choice of setting, mode of communication) into the World Model of the other person. But we don't really see the "inside" of the other person. We can't. All we see is the response we get, and that has to be interpreted by us using our own World Model. In order for any communication to flow, we have to make a lot of assumptions on the mental "anatomy" of the communications partner. And these assumptions, and sometimes a lack of awareness of the complete scope of our messages are the reasons that so much communication leads to misunderstandings.
So. Thats how "keyhole surgery" and communications can be compared. The huge difference between keyhole surgery and communication (apart from the fact that it is probably not a very strong analogy) is that it is usually performed by highly trained surgeons who spend years and years in university, and many more years practicing as residents in a hospital before they get to cut anyone open. The risks are simply too high, keyhole or not, a lot of things can go wrong and we want our surgeons to be the best.
With communication, however, most people are untrained and unaware of how communication even works, and therefore very unsuccessful in getting their points across successfully in many situations.
This series of blogs is intended to capture essential ideas about the art and science of communication. To create a Communications Flow System (CommFlowSystem) of training that provides a structured approach to become a master of communication at all levels.
The fundamental axioms of the CommFlowSystem will be based on the following categories
(1) Community ... how to establish common ground / rapport with the target audience or culture earning the right to establish a flow
(2) Intent ... be clear on the purpose and intended outcome(s) of the communication, (inform, inspire, entertain, educate, call to action, ...)
(3) Coherence ... how to apply ALL means of communication available (body language, setting, medium, language, tools, logic, continuity etc.) in a consistent fashion
(4) Feedback ... since the meaning of any communication is determined by the feedback you obtain this axiom will be about learning how to solicit and read feedback at all levels
(5) Flexibility .. how to adjust to different mental models and approaches to maintain flexibility, respond to feedback and avoid disrupting the flow
(6) Influence .. how to apply an understanding of the mind to influence the flow in a certain direction (calming, persuading, objection handling etc.)
(7) Clarity ... how to achieve utmost simplicity and how to remove confusion, clutter and waste in your communication
The main goal of this blog series to to distil my personal experience as well as 100's of books read into an essential guide that will help anyone to become a better communicator.
I look forward to your ideas, input and feedback
Vierkirchen, Feb 13, 2011
I really like the idea of remembering that we are attempting to open a hole into the world model of someone else, and that we may have at best an assumption as to what that persons framework of emotions, thinking, and experience is. It suggests a definate need to establish several layers of communication as you mentioned. And it suggests a need to be very perceptive about responses in order to better understand their world model - like reading a sonogram. Finally, anything we hope to communicate is subject to this person's world model. Our concepts and meanings we are attempting to insert into their world model must attach and hang from this model.
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